lollypop

my glasses are dirty. the ones on my face, i mean. i should clean them. i have sharpie on my hand. well...markings of a sharpie anyways. that should also be lathered off. my non-existent crown hurts. that's a sentence you don't read everyday. i used to have a crown in my mouth. it fell out when it came into battle with a rice krispy in late march, 2006. right before the rachmaninoff recital. i planned on putting it back in, but i accidentally lost it somehow. do not ask me how or why or when or where, for i do not have the answers to these questions. two ibuprofen tablets are swimming inside me trying to make me feel better. they are slow, but sure. surely they are slow. slowly they are sure. sure, they're slow but...ok. enough.

i've decided to quit myspace. at least the everyday addiction that i have been feeding over the past year. it has eaten more time than any other pointless hobby in which i have indulged myself (i.e. photoshop). i feel good about this decision. strong. defiant. calm. yes.

here is what Proverbs 25 offered me today . . .

Like one who takes away a garment on a cold day,
or like vinegar poured on soda,
is one who sings songs to a heavy heart.
(prov. 25:20)

besides the fact that i didn't know soda existed during Bible times, there is a very important lesson here. one that i hadnt really put much conscious thought towards until this morning. So often when someone is struggling with an issue, we hand out blanket statements like "just trust God" or "it'll be okay" or "just smile and be happy". i loathe those phrases. that't not to say i've never used them. i don't love everything i say. And they may be useful on a keychain or as a toilet paper print, but when someone is dealing with personal issues that run deep, there is no way a three-word phrase is going to ease any of the pain. that's not to say we should be long winded (like i am right now) and hand out as many phrases as possible. But...i guess the moral of this paragraph is that we need to be sensitive towards others. It sounds like something i would have learned in preschool (had i actually gone to preschool. i started my education with kindergarten) but it's something we fail to do. i fail to do. either we don't have the patience to sit down and actually hear the story of someone else's drama or we simply don't want to be involved and hope that somehow by being happy and bubbly and annoying we will make them just like us.

it's late, my ghost tooth hurts and i am extremely tired. time for sweet beddy-bye. or byddy-be. whichever.