belize, how i miss thee.

i think it goes without saying that i am missing Belize like crazy right now. i miss the smells, the community, the purpose. everything. what i would give to be back there right now. dang. hopefully the pictures will give whoever you are a taste of what it was like.

one of my absolute favorite memories of being there is when we first arrived to the camp - the Baptist Training Center - and we had 3 hours of free time until dinner. i went into the girl's dorm and laid down on my bed, which faced the window. belize is always hot and humid, so i didn't need any blankets - just a sheet. i put on pajamas and i laid there, still. as i stared out the window, it began to rain. it was a beautiful sound - the falling rain, the chirping echo of jungle birds and cricket songs - and distant voices of my teammates who were out exploring the camp. i was so incredibly tired from our red-eye flight and hours upon hours of travel, that it made this moment even sweeter. i have a hard time explaining what it was like - but i remember when i laid there, i thought to myself "i will never forget what this was like."

i just finished playing 3 rounds of scattergories and 3 rounds of scrabble with my family for 3 hours. scrabble is so educational. i learned new words like "os" and "rax" and "tig". i was pretty proud of myself for using the word "pram".

sometimes i wish i could shrink to the size of a gnat and crawl inside a book and stay there until the storms pass.

i've had this really odd feeling lately. i've been lounging around the house for about two weeks now (for various reasons which i will not disclose here). and even though i have no obligations, really, i constantly feel a sense of urgency inside and it's prevented me from truly focusing on anything for more than a few minutes. i continuously feel like i have a deadline or something - and i can't put my finger on it. i don't know what that means. hopefully just my insides telling my outsides that i am wasting my time with puzzles and tv and sleeping and crocheting. why didn't i ever feel like this as a student? weird.

alright...it's time to go to bed. i have to wake up early in order to go accompany for a church in the morning. just think . . . in 13 hours, i won't have to accompany ever again if i don't want to. aaahhh.. relief. cha cha cha.